Tuesday, February 16, 2010

A Letter To Myself....Get Over It.

Dear Self,
Congratulations. You’ve done it again. Do you not realize, after 32 ½ years, that procrastination is NOT your friend? Why do you do it? Stop setting expectations, stop making promises. Do NOT obligate yourself to anyone or anything. You should know by now. If you have no one and nothing to answer for….then you can’t let anyone down.
Really? No. I don’t think it’s that simple. You see, you’re neurotic. Always have been, always will be. It’s YOU. You’re the one who’s up and down, all over the place, and back again. YOU keep letting YOURSELF down. Can’t escape those awful demons. Can’t hide from the not-so-impressed-face in the mirror.
What’s a girl to do? What do YOU do?
Well, for starters; GET OVER YOURSELF. So you’ve got issues, big deal. Everybody does. Put on your big girl panties and take control.
Stop waiting for other people to make you happy. Stop depending on other people to “come around”. Stop giving others the benefit of the doubt when they clearly don’t deserve it.
Stop letting other people and their ridiculously inconsistent relationships with you, determine how YOU feel and how YOU cope. Stop it and get over it.
So you don’t like cold weather? Boo-hoo. Spring will come, it always does. Get over it.
So you prayed to the Sun for warmth, but instead woke up to 4+ feet of SNOW? You can’t control this. Get over it.
So you might want to go back to work? Then get off your butt and apply for a job. Get over it.
But wait a minute, maybe you want to have another baby…..hmmmm. What exactly does THAT mean? You do love being home with your kids. Being a mom has been the greatest thing that’s ever happened to you.
C’mon Wishy-Washy, do you really want to have another baby, or are you just balking at the idea of really moving on to the next phase of your existence? Figure it out. Get over it.
So your hormones are surging, your body is changing, and your kids are growing. You’ve got a good life, yet you don’t understand it. You want to feel fulfilled, yet you’re constantly searching. You don’t know where to start, you don’t see the finish line, and you’re feeling too overwhelmed to begin the journey.
WHAT journey? What ARE you talking about, and WHAT do you mean?
I’ve got news for you. If you’re looking for control, a sense of self-worth, a feeling of accomplishment…… you won’t find it here. See, I think you’re still looking for excuses; a reason to continue your self-pity party, a chance to wallow in your sorrow just a little longer.
Not here, get over it.
You started this experiment. It was YOUR idea. You said you wanted to improve your relationship and YOURSELF. It must be working, otherwise it wouldn’t be this hard.
You ALWAYS quit. Don’t do it now. Get over it.
And don’t you dare get mad at your husband for pushing you to continue. He wants to do this. He wants to do this with YOU. Consider yourself lucky, and get back to work.
Therapy, you ask? Yes, you skipped your session….AGAIN. Yes, you were terribly mean, sarcastic, and cruel when he tried to hold you accountable. Yeah, you suck.
Are there people out there waiting for your next post? Do they expect you to write every week? You did make that promise. A couple times actually. Do they care? I don’t know. Do YOU care? They’re waiting for a weekly post…… yeah, SO AM I.
Does this make any sense? I don’t think so. Will this help? Probably not. Do you care enough to do the necessary work to change? We’ll see.
Go ahead and type it. Say “until next time”……. You always do. But do you really know that time will come?
Get off your butt and get to work. Stop rambling, stop wallowing, stop trying to run away. Do it now. If you don’t, your readers (whoever, wherever, and however dedicated they may be), will surely be the next to say…… GET OVER IT.
Don’t bother signing. I know who you are. We all know you've spent a lifetime trying to avoid ME. But YOU didn’t quit. YOU wouldn’t let me escape. Good or bad, we’re in this thing together. Understand this or not, it is what it is. And right now all that means is this: Until next time…………………….


www.nelliebugs.com said...

Hmm, sounds like I coulda-shoulda written this to myself! "Get over it" should be everyone's motto. Oh, and aren't we ALL neurotic? lol

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IASoupMama said...

Ah, procrastination... Been there, done that too many times to count... many hugs!

www.nelliebugs.com said...

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christina said...

I just wanted to let you know I really love your blog..I feel like I could have writted a lot of what you write. I look forward to reading what you will say next. Please know your thoughts and feelings have def made a difference and have even made me feel less alone...thank you for that!!

SAHM said...

You have an award waiting for you at my blog!


parenting ad absurdum said...

Love your honesty - and part of this post sounds like it could have taken place in my own head. The hardest part is always getting started, for me. But knowing this doesn't make it any easier...

Peryl (From MBC)

AudreyO said...

So while I agree there is lots we need to "get over" I also believe we need to believe we are absolutely important :)